Chocolate Cake

Every year for the past 13 years I have made a chocolate cake on September 22. It's Mike's birthday. There wasn't much Mike absolutely loved but that is one thing that made him giddy like a child. He didn't care for a store bought cake. He like a plain old box cake with whipped chocolate frosting. No sprinkles, no bedazzling...simple. 

The first year I made his cake was 2003. We had been married just 9 months and he had just returned from his first tour in Iraq. We lived in a small apartment in Spring Valley. It was just him and I but I made a big deal that day. I walked across the street and bought a pack of silly party hats at the dollar store and made him put one on before he blew out his candles. I wouldn't let him touch the cake until he put on the hat. 

He spent so much time alone before we married that he didn't really celebrate things. Holidays and birthdays were just another day to him. I brought out the silly in him. We were different that way. I looked for any reason to celebrate. I tended to make a big deal out of the little stuff. In time he followed suit. It wasn't easy but after awhile he knew resistance was futile. If you can't beat them...join them.

The annual chocolate cake became a tradition. No matter where we were, together or apart I made his cake. Some of the years he was in Iraq. Some he was on duty, others on training missions. When he was at work I would bring his cake and sing loud and proud. He pretended it embarrassed him but I know deep down he appreciated it and eventually relied on it. He just knew. 

This will be the third chocolate cake now that I've made for him since he died. No matter how many years he's been gone its a tradition I share with the kids. We celebrate their dads life. If it weren't for his birth, nothing we know and love would be here. They exist because he did. I learned what true unconditional love was through loving him. 

He's gone but the life and love he created is still here and growing. Tomorrow I will bake that cake. We will wish him a happy 41st birthday in heaven. The only thing in life that ever stays the same is that everything changes....and chocolate cake on September twenty second.

Happy Birthday up there Big Daddy. We love you and miss you always.

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