Hello 2019

This is my fist blog of 2019. It may also be my last... ever. So much has happened. Some good. Some terrible. But it's changed my perspective.

Where to start?

A year ago my biological father slipped into a coma. Just days after one of my close friends died in Florida. They passed with in a week of each other. That was hard. So tough.

Last fall I lost my best friend. She's still very much alive and I wish nothing but happiness and success for her and her children. She's currently in a situation that makes me feel very unsafe and although I cannot tell her what to do or accept in her life...I can use my boundaries to protect myself and my children. I overlooked a lot in the past but I will not bring that madness into our lives again. We deserve security and safety in our home. My family must come first.

On January 9th 2019, the day before my 40th birthday I lost my daddy. The one who raised me. The one man who chose to love me even when i made it so hard for him. The one who never gave up on me. It is still hard today a month on but I will survive. He made me strong.

That's the thing, when my dad died I didn't even know who to call. I have spent the past six years being everyone else's "go-to" that I realized I'd made it impossible to have my own.

So I have to change things... again. I am going to work more on my personal relationships now. I hope in the past few years I've been able to connect with you personally and that somehow my story spoke to you. I hope you feel less alone in the world. It was never my intention to isolate myself in doing so. But it happened.

It's my time now. Its not about Mike or suicide or loss, PTSD, Vets Rights, Being a Marine's widow...its just me. Just living my life. Just Misty.

I will probably leave my years of blogs up to help others but dont look for future entries. My life is my own now. I've paid my debt. I've shown you how I got here, full disclosure. The good bad and ugly and I truly care about your recovery too. Just from a distance. You'll always be in my heart. But this chapter has closed so a new one may begin.

Semper Fi.

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