Resentment
I guess the only way to describe my feeling today is resentful.
I was watching some stupid TV show and a couple was out walking by the ocean and he got down on one knee and proposed. They were both crying. She said yes and they kiss and hugged and it was beautiful....and it pissed me off.
I don't even know why. I don't love anyone enough to marry them. I don't know if I ever even want to marry again. I just want the love back. I would have done anything for him. He had my whole heart. I could look in his eyes and see my whole world.
I'm starting to date again but it's not the same. I'm trying to keep my heart open.
I desperately want to be loved so unconditionally again. I want to love.
Happy couples just make me angry today.
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